


Thirsty For Haderade

by DRHPaints



Series: Kinky Bill One Shots [14]
Category: American (US) Actor RPF, Bill Hader - Fandom, Bill Hader RPF, US Comedians RPF
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Play, Biting, Blow Jobs, Established Relationship, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Hair-pulling, Hand Jobs, Light Dom/sub, Masturbation, One Shot, Overstimulation, Pool Sex, Rimming, Shameless Smut, Smut, Twitter, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:33:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27265039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DRHPaints/pseuds/DRHPaints
Summary: When Bill discovers his girlfriend Layla used to have Twitter account dedicated to him sporting explicit content, initially he’s upset, until Bill considers some of the acts Layla described in her tweets and finds himself titillated.
Relationships: Bill Hader/Original Female Character
Series: Kinky Bill One Shots [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1877902
Comments: 4
Kudos: 17





	Thirsty For Haderade

**Author's Note:**

> Anonymously requested. Hope you enjoy!

After a couple of months together, Bill found himself increasingly intrigued by Layla. She was eccentric, never keeping what one would call a regular sleep schedule and often engaging in a fresh creative pursuit until all hours of the night. She was funny, provoking a peal of endless giggles from Bill as she told him wacky stories about her days at work. But more than anything, Bill found her refreshingly fun. Something that was missing a bit too often from his life lately.

When Bill found himself rifling through the records at Amoeba for what had to be the thousandth time, it wasn’t until his large hand closed over a _Broken Social Scene_ vinyl that he glanced up and noticed the pretty woman eyeing him from behind the register. Bringing his purchases to the front, they struck up a conversation about some of their favorite artists, finding mutual ground, and when Bill asked Layla out for coffee she gladly accepted.

Now, as Layla showered before heading to her shift, Bill padded through the house, fresh cup of coffee in hand as he snagged a banana. Layla’s laptop sat open on the kitchen table and, walking by, Bill caught a glimpse of his own name out of the corner of his eye.

Bill paused. Tuning in his ears, he heard the cascading water from down the hall. Bill knew he shouldn’t. Knew it was an invasion of privacy. But his curiosity got the better of him as he plunked down and peered at the screen.

It displayed a Twitter page, and Bill’s cobalt eyes widened when he saw the username @ThirstyForHaderade beside a picture of Layla making a silly face. As Bill scrolled he ground his teeth, muscle in his sharp jaw flickering.

_@ThirstyForHaderade-Damn, Bill looks sexy af hosting SNL tonight. Want to climb that wonky fucker like a sequoia._

_Bill’s jawline is inhuman. Seriously. I just want to sit on his face. Built like a chair for a reason. Yowza._

_Watched ‘The To Do List’ today and all I could think about was riding That Big Ol’ Dick in the pool. I have a problem. Oh well. Not even mad about it._

_Ugh, I would let Bill do almost anything to me. Those big ass hands? Just push me around, sir. PLEASE._

Then Bill came to a series of tweets that all were apparently sent within hours of one another.

_Getting turnt and watching ‘Hot Rod.’ I apologize in advance for what I’m about to subject y’all to, but you know I want Dave’s greasy paws all over me._

_Bill has no ass. Zip. Nada. It is practically concave. And yet it’s so sexy. Adorable as hell. Staring at it in those torn jeans makes me...think things._

_Alright, I’m five drinks in so...here goes. I want to eat Bill Hader’s ass until I make him scream my name in 20 different voices. THERE. I SAID IT. ARE YOU HAPPY, TWITTER?_

“Bill?” Towel clutched around her chest, Layla’s eyes darted in alarm between Bill and her computer.

Sitting back in his chair, Bill pointed at the screen. “Layla…” Voice low, Bill didn’t blink and Layla desperately wished she’d taken the time to get dressed before coming out. “What is this?”

“I…” Mouth working open and closed in silence, Layla raised a hand defensively, then sighed. “Bill, I...I’m so sorry.” Shaking her head, Layla swallowed. “That’s a really old account and...and I swear I forgot about it. I just logged in today to delete it because I remembered…” Speaking barely above a whisper, Layla studied the floor. “I remembered how embarrassing it was. Bill, I...when I wrote that stuff…” Doubling her grip on the towel, Layl was certain her face was a violent shade of pink. “I never thought I’d actually meet you and...and I wrote most of it when I was drunk. It’s...it’s so stupid.” She took a step toward him, then, seeing Bill’s flat expression, thought better of it. “I’m sorry. I really...I really didn’t mean to be so disrespectful…”

Bill stood, hand flat on the table and staring at the opposite wall. “I’d feel better if you deleted it now.” Rod of steel under his voice, Bill didn’t look at her. “If, like you said, that’s what you were going to do…”

“Yeah…” Nodding hastily, Layla went to the chair, clicking, her hands trembling from nerves. “There.” She rested back, biting her lip. “It’s...it’s gone.”

Just nodding, Bill continued to face away. Layla sat silently for a moment before clearing her throat and rising. “Okay, well, um...I’ll...I’ll just go get dressed.”

Scurrying back to Bill’s bedroom, Layla jumped into her clothes so quickly it wasn’t until she got to work that she realized her underwear were on backwards. Bill didn’t say goodbye. Didn’t swoop in with his strong arms and soft lips to give Layla a kiss that always made her want to call in sick before she left. No. Statue-like, he remained in the kitchen as Layla gathered her purse and crept toward the door.

“I’m sorry, Bill…” Layla whispered, worried they might be the last words she ever said to him.

***

Lying in bed two nights later, Bill hadn’t contacted Layla. And wasn’t surprised she didn’t text him, considering. But a nagging corner of his mind, despite what transpired, continued to prod Bill. Reminding him of her laugh. How it overtook Layla’s entire body, nothing short of a cackle, Bill appreciating that Layla didn’t restrict her mirth for the sake of propriety. Her intellect. How Layla somehow was one of the few people Bill encountered that could go almost toe to toe with him in film knowledge, both of them discovering they once worked at movie theaters and swapping horror stories. 

And, as he shifted on the sheets, Bill had to admit he missed Layla’s touch. After a couple of months of ravenously tearing into one another at every opportunity, Bill kicked himself for becoming accustomed to regular sex with a beautiful woman who, not only enjoyed exploring one another’s bodies, but let Bill try out a few things he was previously unable to with other partners.

Bill’s mind wandered back to the tweets. At first a simmering anger rose, coating the back of his throat in acrid bile. But then, Bill thought about their content. _Well, she got to do one of them, at least._ Bill considered the last time Layla’s thighs were positioned over his cheeks, screaming and tugging his dark hair, before he blinked at the ceiling and rolled over.

The last post in particular crept over his brain. Obviously Bill knew people did that sort of thing, but he never tried it himself. Unbidden, the image of Layla’s face between his legs, parting him wide and licking forward bubbled into Bill’s consciousness. Bill’s cock twitched beneath his boxers. He swallowed hard.

Looking around his empty bedroom as though someone might catch him, Bill picked up his phone and the lube from his bedside drawer. His thumb hovered over the search bar for what seemed like a long time. Finally he typed in _‘Rimming_.’

Bill scrolled until he saw a picture of a red haired woman not unlike Layla crouched before a man on his back. Biting the inside of his cheek, Bill tapped play. As he watched the video unfold, Bill palmed himself over his boxers before his large hand breached the waistband. Tugging his cock, Bill paused, resting the phone on his firm chest and squirting out the lube.

Encircling himself once more, Bill sheepishly dipped between his thighs, rubbing over the tight circle of muscle with his sticky fingertips and letting out a soft moan. 

After a couple of minutes Bill abandoned his phone, right hand jerking his ock wildly while he used two fingers to swipe over his hole, imagining it was close to what Layla’s tongue might feel like as he thrust into his palm.

“ _Oh fuck! Fuck! Layla!”_ Crying out into the abandoned room, Bill shot ropes of cum over his shirt, thick thighs shaking and breathing hard. After he took a few minutes to compose himself, Bill got up to wash his hands and went to sleep, mind aswirl.

***

Clocking out for her lunch break, Layla fished her phone out of her pocket as she started toward the deli. 

Bill: _Hey_.

One word. One single word. But it gave Layla hope as she froze on the sidewalk, a woman behind bumping into her abruptly halting form as her thumbs raced over the keyboard.

Layla: _Hey, how are you? I’m really sorry, Bill._

Bill: _I know. Just please don’t hide something like that from me again, okay?_

Layla: _Never. I won’t. I know I really fucked up_.

Bill: _I still want to see you._

Layla: _That’s great. Thank you. Anytime, just let me know_.

Bill: _Are you free tonight?_

Layla agreed to go to Bill’s house after her shift. When he opened the door, smiling, though perhaps forcibly so, Layla walked in tentatively. “You want something to drink?” Bill asked as they entered the kitchen.

“Just water, please.” 

Nodding, Bill got down two glasses and handed one to her, tossing back half before he lowered it to the counter. “You know…” Clearing his throat, Bill studied the floor. “Before you came in...I read some of those tweets.”

“Oh shit, Bill, I…” Hand to her brow, Layla shook her head. “I’m so sorry, again. I’m just...I’m mortified.”

“Yeah.” Bill’s voice sank nearly an octave as Layla saw him take half a step closer. “You were... _bad_.”

Gaze meeting his own, Bill seemed to be examining her, his sapphire eyes moving thoughtfully over Layla’s face as his head slowly tipped to the side.

“Yeah…” Mouth parting, Layla’s breath hitched. “I was.”

Bill finally blinked. Layla hadn’t realized how long he’d been staring until that moment. “Hmm.” Approaching her, Bill’s big hands went to her waist, focus zeroed in on her eyes. Layla lifted her arms to touch him, but Bill gently took her wrists, guiding them back down to her side.

Clamping back down above her hips, Bill marched Layla back to the bedroom, one patient step at a time. Silent. Stoic. His touch somehow tender and also a warning.

Once inside, Bill turned away from her, closing the door behind them. Leaning back against it, he crossed his strong arms, elevator stare climbing her curves.

“Take off your clothes.” It was hardly more than a whisper, Bill’s pink lips caressing the words as he narrowed his eyes. But Layla couldn’t look away for a moment as she lifted her shirt overhead and tossed it to the floor.

“Slower.” Resting back further, Bill crossed his ankles, mouth a flat line. “You like to show off online where everyone can see, don’t you?” Angling his head, Bill appeared almost snakelike in that instant as Layla’s fingers went to the button of her jeans. “Show off for me.”

Unzipping carefully, Layla swiveled her hips as she inched her pants to the floor, stepping free before turning her back to Bill. Unhooking her bra, Layla allowed the straps to drop, giving him an alluring look over her shoulder before twisting, lowering the cups and running her fingers over her perky breasts.

“Mmm.” Bill gave a curt nod of approval, eyes fixed as Layla snuck her thumbs beneath the waistband of her panties, peeling them down before rising, naked, and tossing back her scarlet hair.

“Lay down.” Voice soft, Bill pushed away from the door as Layla crawled onto the mattress. Removing his shirt, Bill blinked down at her. “Spread your legs. Show me.” Knees widening, Layla’s breath caught as she witnessed Bill’s dark blue eyes soaking in her sprawled form. “Play with yourself.”

Fingers moving between her thighs, Layla rubbed through the slickness as Bill shrugged out of his jeans. Taking a deep breath, Bill drew a hand over the long line of his erection over his boxers. “Is this what you did, Layla?” Exhaling audibly, Bill’s mouth filled with saliva as he watched her ministrations quicken and he gave himself a generous pull. “Did you used to touch yourself? Thinking about me?”

Nodding, Layla sunk two fingers inside of herself for a moment before passing over her clit again. “I still do, Bill.”

“Mmm…” Eyes falling closed, Bill’s hand entered his boxers and he tugged his raw cock twice before flashing open again and shucking them off. 

Bill approached like a wild animal from the brush, all rolling limbs and piercing eyes as he made a cage around Layla’s body on the bed. Palms flat, Bill extended his long legs until his cock rested atop her wet pussy, then, reaching down, spread Layla’s thighs further before he began rotating his hips.

“So…” Bill traced his nose down the side of her face, breath warm on her skin as his cock swiped tantalizingly over Layla’s swollen clit. “You want me to push you around? Hmm?”

”Yeah…” Swallowing her anticipation, Layla raised a hand to run her fingers through his chestnut waves, but Bill quickly grabbed her wrist, guiding it back to the mattress.

Instead he fisted his own hand in Layla’ red tresses, twisting slightly and narrowing his eyes. “You like it when I pull your hair maybe? Hmm?”

“Yes, Bill.” Layla nodded, hips rising to meet his strokes before he gave her a light yank to the side, Layla gasping in delight.

Bill let out a hiss, stormy blue eyes widening and nose flaring. “Yeah...you like that, huh? What about…” Swooping into her neck, Bill’s pink lips brushed before his teeth dragged over Layla’s sensitive skin. “If I bite you? Hmm? You want that?”

Unable to resist kissing his jaw, Bill’s stubble chafing, Layla exhaled into his joined ear. “Yes. _Please_.” Rounded teeth sank into her flesh and Layla squeaked, back arching. Releasing, Bill licked the spot bearing his mark, lips tender as they peppered their way to Layla’s collarbone.

“You want me to fuck you? Hmm?” Bearing down harder, Layla rutted into Bill’s pelvis and scrabbled at his tiny love handles.

“Yes. Please, Bill. _Fuck me!”_

Without warning Bill quickly rocked back on his knees, and two powerful arms flipped Layla over on the bed, air huffing out of her as she landed and Bill rummaged in the bedside drawer for a condom. 

Shoving her legs apart, the entirety of Bill’s weight rested upon her as Layla felt the head of his cock insistently at her entrance, Bill’s breath ragged above her. “You ready to get fucked?”

Pushing her round ass into him, Layla fisted her hands in the sheets. “ _Yes, Bill! Yes! Please, fuck me!”_

Inserting himself not more than a couple of inches, Bill lowered his mouth to her ear, voice a canyon and mouth a snarl. “You ready to get fucked _hard?”_

“ _Yes! Fuck! Now, Bill! Please!”_

Bill clapped into her with an open mouthed groan, his dark blue eyes fluttering shut as he twirled his cock inside of her. “Oh Layla, fuck…” Sitting back on his heels, Bill snatched Layla’s hips and brought her with him, arm snaking around as he began fiddling her clit before vigorously pounding her.

Head tossed back and sculpted jaw hanging, Bill rammed into her with abandon, bed frame shaking as Layla panted into the sheets, driving herself back on Bill’s thick cock. “ _Yes! Fuck me, Bill! Yes!”_

Bill moaned, and it was possibly Layla’s favorite sound in the world. It would begin low in his built chest, almost a grunt, and then as though the noises were being ripped from him unwillingly, they would end in a high, vulnerable note, Bill losing himself completely as his voice ricocheted off the walls.

Her body tensing around him, Bill raced over Layla’s clit and hammered her mercilessly. “Are you gonna cum? Huh?” 

Quaking around him and splaying her hands over the bed, Layla urgently whispered, “ _Yes...yes...yes…_ ”

Once her tremors faded, Bill retracted, hoisting Layla into the air once more and slamming her onto her back before hauling both of her legs over his vast shoulders, sheathing his cock to the hilt with a growl.

“Mmm... _fuck!”_ Bill barreled into her recklessly, thumbing her clit as his cries of ecstasy rose to whimpering wails. “ _Yeah! Layla, fuck! Yes! You feel so damn good!_ ”

“ _Bill! Fuck! You’re so deep! I...I…_ ” A tremulous scream escaped her as Layla constricted violently around his turgid cock, limbs rattling and eyes rolling as Bill emitted an unctuous sigh.

Lowering her legs, Bill took Layla’s face in both hands, resting their foreheads together as his toes dug into the sheets and he panted into her open mouth. “ _Layla! Fuck! Yes! You’re gonna make me cum! Fuck!”_

Almost shouting with euphoria as his movements grew uncoordinated and his breathing shuddered, Bill cradled Layla’s head and scrunched his eyes. “ _Fuck! I’m gonna cum! Fuck! FUCK!”_ Stilling above her, Bill deflated with a shiver and a needy whine, collapsing on top of Layla and gulping air.

Lips moving lazily over her salty skin, Bill attempted to run his hand through Layla’s hair, but mostly only succeeded in petting her head before he composed himself and rolled off, getting up to throw away the condom before rejoining her in bed.

Clutching her chest, Layla blinked at the ceiling. “ _Fuck_ , Bill..that was...that was spectacular.”

Lassoing her into his strong arms, Bill giggled and kissed the top of her head. “So…” Smirk blossoming on his wide mouth, Bill snuggled down with her on the mattress. “When we met...was I as good as your fantasies?”

Tipping up her chin, Layla caught Bill’s mouth and smiled. “Better.”

***

The next morning, grateful they both had a day off, Layla sat across from Bill at the kitchen table, lifting cereal to her lips and adjusting to the idea of consciousness when he peeked at his phone.

“Hmm.” Bill frowned appraisingly. “Supposed to be pretty hot out today.”

Not fully present yet, Layla nodded, drinking coffee and hoping it would reboot her, unsurprised she was exhausted after the night before.

Bill gazed out at the yard, crossing his arms. “So…” Oceanic eyes sliding in her direction, a prominent dark eyebrow crept up his forehead. “You want to go swimming?”

Glancing up, Layla blinked out at the pool. “Oh. Well…” Shrugging, she took another sip of coffee. “I don’t have a swimsuit here.”

“And?” Slow, sexy smirk blooming on his face, Bill ran his tongue over his teeth inside his mouth and Layla was suddenly more alert than she imagined possible on only half a cup of caffeine. 

“Yeah.” She smiled, nodding. “I’d love to.”

Bill donned a pair of swim shorts, Layla admiring his elegant form as they padded outside. Turning, his eyes roamed over her body as Layla disrobed, California sun warming her naked flesh before they jumped in. 

Droplets falling from his short brown locks, Bill grinned as he floated towards her, splashing a gargantuan wave into Layla’s face. “Hey!” She cried indignantly. 

Lifting a shoulder, Bill giggled. “What’re you gonna do about it?” 

Layla swam toward him, encasing Bill squidlike in her limbs. “Oh...I have a few ideas…” Linking their lips, Bill glided them to the pool's edge, Layla’s nude body pressing against the tile as she sensed his burgeoning erection beneath his trunks.

Twisting around, Layla worked them down Bill’s thick thighs before, with a wink and a smile, taking a tremendous breath and diving. 

As Layla took Bill into her mouth, chlorine flavor slightly annoying while she sucked intensely, she found it more difficult than she realized to stay beneath the surface. Emerging with a gasp, Bill chuckled, wiggling out of his shorts the rest of the way before his sizable hands went to Layla’s hips. 

“So…” Bill hooked her thighs over his waist, cock swiping past the lips of her pussy as Layla draped her arms over his expansive shoulders. “You wanted to fuck me in a pool, huh?”

Rolling her eyes, Layla smiled. “Bill…” Catching his mouth briefly, she locked her legs behind him. “I want to fuck you anywhere.”

Lips linking, Bill’s mouth was hungry, urgent, as his fingers drifted between Layla’s thighs, coaxing her until she hummed against him. Twisting his wrist, Bill sank his middle and ring fingers inside of her, curling until he hit the soft patch of tissue and fiddling her clit. Bill drove Layla into the wall, cock forcing his hand deeper as her moans echoed oddly over the surface of the water.

“ _Oh Bill! Yes! Fuck!”_ Layla snaked an arm between them, covering Bill’s cock and rubbing furiously to compound the pressure as he swiveled against her.

“Mmm...yeah, Layla. That’s good…” Nodding, Bill’s hips pumped and Layla clung close, both working against the reduced gravity as they sought friction.

Hair dripping and bodies thrashing, Layla frenetically rocked into Bill’s touch, nails slipping over his wide back. “ _Fuck! Yes, Bill! I’m gonna cum! Fuck!_ ” Twiddling faster, Bill watched Layla unravel, face morphing and body shaking beneath his ministrations, smiling in satisfaction.

Taking a few breaths, Layla tossed back her sopping hair, latching onto Bill’s lips before she took his massive cock in both hands. Jerking furiously, waves radiated outward from them as Bill humped her warm fists, moaning into Layla’s mouth. Fingers kneading her ass, Bill’s balls drew close to his body and he left her face, neck arched and unholy noises of desire issuing from his throat. 

“ _Layla! Fuck! I’m gonna cum! Yes! Fuck!”_ Trembling, trailing pearls of cum hovered around them as Bill knit their mouths together, stubbled chin dewy but still scratchy as it passed over Layla’s. 

Climbing out, Bill gave Layla’s ass a gentle pat as they walked back inside, Layla smirking at him over her shoulder as she toweled off her hair.

***

It was a few days before Bill could muster the courage to broach the subject. He rehearsed how he might ask, how the conversation might go in his head probably a hundred times, but it wasn’t until one night after a shift at the store, Layla nestled against him while they watched _Forensic Files_ , that Bill finally cleared his throat.

”So…” Fingers twitching on the arm of the couch, Bill shifted beneath her. “I’m not trying to beat a dead horse or anything, but...about...about those tweets you wrote.”

Layla groaned at herself. “Again, I am so, so, sorry, Bill. It’s awful, I just—“

Bill waved a hand dismissively. “Yeah, but, um…” Chewing his lip, Bill was glad they had the excuse of facing the television as he continued. “You...you mentioned something in one of them about…” _Say it, Bill. Just say it. “_ Rimming.” Voice squeaking out even higher than normal, Bill inwardly cringed.

“Oh shit.” Layla smacked a hand over her face and shook her head. “That’s...that’s so embarrassing I want to die. I’m...I’m sorry.”

Bill bobbed his head slowly and allowed a silent beat to pass. “So was that, um…” Trying to resist the urge to bounce his leg in his nerves, Bill’s hand formed a fist. “Were you just being funny, or...do you...do that?”

Layla looked up. Bill was resolutely staring at the television screen, muscle in his jaw popping and stiff beside her. “Oh.” Sitting up a little, Layla shrugged. “I haven’t done it, actually, but…” Gnawing on her lip, she leaned in a little and covered Bill’s hand with her own. “I’d like to. For you.” Bill cut his eyes to her, swallowing hard. “Only if you want to…”

Gaze falling, Bill’s mountainous shoulders crumbled inward and when he spoke his voice was almost impossibly small. “If I do, you won’t think…” Rubbing his elbow with the opposite hand, Bill blinked. “You won’t think that’s weird?”

Layla scooted closer, placing an arm around him. “No, of course not.” Speaking tenderly, she gave Bill a light peck and smiled. “There’s nothing wrong with wanting pleasure, Bill.”

Bill gave her a sheepish grin. “Thanks…”

Carding her fingers through his dark tendrils, Layla trickled down to Bill’s firm chest. “You want to try it tonight?”

Bill lifted a shoulder noncommittally and stared at the cushion between them, picking at the fabric. “If you want to…”

Trying to hide her smirk, Layla scratched under his chin. “Do you want to try it _now_ , Bill?”

Giggling a little, Layla couldn’t recall him ever seeing such a hefty hue of pink on his handsome features as Bill’s eyes darted from side to side. “Yeah…”

“Let’s go.” Layla stood and they made their way to the bedroom, Bill unreasonably excited as she closed the door behind them and raised a challenging eyebrow. “Take off your clothes.”

Shedding his garments, Bill held his hands in front of himself, embarrassed that he was already rock hard as Layla gestured to the bed with a smile. “Lay down.”

Bill did, but as Layla approached, he pointed at her. “Hey now.” Shaking his head, Bill giggled. “Why am I naked and you still have all your clothes on? No fair. I want to see you.”

Scoffing in mock annoyance, Layla pooled her t-shirt and shorts on the ground before folding over the mattress. One hand on each of Bill’s carved calves, she slid his legs apart, before hooking her fingers underneath and bending his knees. Pausing, Layla went around to retrieve a pillow. 

Chuckling, Layla arched an eyebrow. “Lift that ass for me, Bill.”

Bill rolled his eyes, giggling as he assented and she placed the folded pillow under the small of his back before returning to the foot of the bed. Massaging his thick thighs, Layla leaned in. “You ready?”

“Yeah.” Bill nodded.

Tongue flicking over his hole, Bill flinched reflexively, but telling himself to relax, allowed his body to sink into the mattress as Layla licked him. “Is this alright?” She popped up her head and looked at him curiously.

Eyes closed and mouth tight, Bill bobbed his head. “Mmhmm…” He inched his hips closer to her. “Keep going…”

Parting his cheeks, Layla dug forward, tongue penetrating and whipping inside of him. Bill arched his back, a tittering moan rising as he bore into Layla’s mouth. “Yeah, that’s...that’s good…” The urge to touch his cock was nearly insatiable, but Bill wanted to make the delicious sensation last as long as possible, so he fisted his huge hands in the sheets, rolling his hips.

Devouring him, Layla kneaded the flesh of Bill’s tiny ass, his mounting moans above her drenching her pussy as she sought his recesses.

“Layla, would you…” Squirming, Bill bit his lip as she extricated herself a little to lap at him. “Would you use some fingers? Maybe?”

Smiling, Layla nodded her head. “Of course. Do you have any lube?”

The speed with which Bill scrambled to the bedside drawer made Layla chuckle as he passed her the tube. Squeezing the sticky liquid over her fingers, Layla touched Bill’s entrance. “How many?”

Eyes shifting, Bill’s voice was a breath above a whisper. “Two, please…”

Layla observed Bill’s body swallowing her knuckle by knuckle, spinning and scissoring him apart before she curled her fingers up. “Oh _yes!”_ Bill yelped, muscular thighs jumping when she first brushed over his prostate. “ _Right there!”_

Bill did this to himself on more than one occasion, but with her angle and delicate hands, Layla was able to move over him with a dexterity previously unknown. Layla began pulsing inside of him, and with every stroke a huffing grunt broke from Bill’s pink lips, planting his heels firmly as he started to fuck himself on Layla’s hand.

Bending her elbow, Layla tamped firmly against Bill’s prostate and a helpless shiver crawled over his pallid flesh. “ _Layla! Yes! Fuck! Just like that!”_ Cock purple and leaking, when Layla started propelling her fingers with rapid exuberance, Bill hammered his fists on the mattress in a pantomime of tantrum to resist touching himself, crying out as his spine curled. “ _Layla! Layla! Yes! Please! Fuck!”_

Light popping behind his eyes, Bill stopped breathing for a moment, twitching fiercely, and somehow Bill entered a realm beyond orgasm. Suddenly it was overwhelming. His body couldn’t escape the sensations but his pelvis seemed to move of its own volition, continuing to slam onto Layla’s tickling fingers.

Layla witnessed many of Bill’s funny expressions, both on and off screen, but this was the most hilarious by far. Had she not been in the throes of arousal, Layla would’ve burst out laughing.

Face tilted down and to the side, the skin under Bill’s neck bunched as his head ticked to the right every few seconds. Left eye fluttering uncontrollably, his sculpted jaw mouthed a series of almost unintelligible half-syllables. “ _Lay-I-Fu-So-Go-Do-Sto-Pl-Fu-Fu-Fu-_ “ Arms striking out at unnatural angles as his wrists folded under and his hands shook, Bill looked like a man with an itch on his back he couldn’t reach, body out of his control and delirious with desire.

Seeing Bill’s contortions and hearing the wheezing shrieks his lungs elicited, Layla spoke gently. “Bill, do you want me to suck you now?”

Bill’s head nodded, but his mouth didn’t communicate anything resembling human speech as he tried to form his lips around words that simply wouldn’t manifest.

Layla enveloping him, Bill exploded. A scream pried from his teeth that, had Bill not been present to hear it, even with his plethora of voices, he wouldn’t have believed himself capable of the sound. Both palms smacking over Layla’s scalp, Bill felt bad for not giving her any warning, but to be fair, he didn’t have any either as his upper body lifted completely from the mattress, hot cum shooting into the back of her throat as he shook like a man undergoing electroshock, whites of his eyes all that were visible and mouth agape before Bill collapsed, seeking oxygen and pushing a hand to Layla’s shoulder.

“ _Don’t...don’t touch me…_ ” Bill breathed, shocks shooting over his pasty skin as he drew his knees up to his chest and rolled onto his side, telling himself to inhale, to exhale.

Concerned, Layla laid beside him. “Bill...are you okay? I’m sorry, I hope I didn’t—”

“No, no…” Chest heaving, Bill shook his head, eyes remaining shut. “You were...amazing. I just...I need a minute.”

Actually Bill needed about twenty minutes, during which Layla brought him a glass of cold water and he drank thankfully. Reality piecing itself back together around him, Bill guided Layla back and kissed his way down her body. Parking between her legs, Bill bore forward with his crisp jaw and consumed Layla voraciously.

Thighs glued to his head, Layla struggled to discern which orgasm had her screaming Bill’s name as she dripped down his square chin, the lines between them blurring while he sucked her clit into his mouth and his agile hands massaged her body.

Leaving her a puddle of useless limbs on the mattress, Bill rose and wiped his face before scooping Layla into his firm arms. Draping herself over the long line of his body, Layla nestled into Bill with a contented sigh, and, smiling and sated, sleep claimed them.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read! If you enjoyed this story, please leave a comment or come say hi on tumblr at fandomtransmandom. I also take requests!


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